Rock Band vs Guitar Hero

Fall, 2005. I'm a senior in college, splittin' a room with J, livin' with the guys in Milbrook. Kros mentions he got some really frickin lame sounding game about a guitar-ddr crossover with a plastic guitar. A few weeks later, we have Guitar Hero 1 in our common room and are rocking out on a regular basis. Now, almost 3 years later, GH3 is out, as is Rock Band, GH3's prime competitor in the fake-plastic-instrument-video-game-whynotspendyourtimelearningarealinstrumentinsteadofwastingallthistimeonfakeinstruments-market.
So here it is. Guitar Hero versus Rock Band. The final say. The winner is... Rock Band, by a landslide.




I was hesitant at first about Rock Band. I was a loyal GH fan, and vocals/drums seemed kinda dumb. BUT, like with GH 3 years ago, I was wrong. Rock Band is superior to Guitar Hero in every single way.

1. Drums/vocals. This adds a whole new fun element in the game. At first I was timid about singing, but no longer. It's a lot of fun. Who cares if you have an awful singing voice. Your friends will be too glued into hitting the right notes on their instruments to notice. And drums, although difficult, is also very fun. If you have 4 ppl playing GH, you gotta alternate songs. Rock Band is great for groups of friends-maybe one of the best hang-out-and-play-with-friends games of all time for any system.

2. The Campaign. I'll admit I'm not familiar with GH3's campaign mode, and comparing RB to GH1 would be unfair. So I'll just rave about RB. The "World Tour" starts in just a few cities, and as things progress, you can unlock new cities and bigger venues. Also, in venues you have options to play single songs, or sets. And there are challenges and stuff along the way, and new things can be unlocked, like a sound guy, PR firm, etc. Very addicting and fun to play.

3. The guitar gameplay. Of all things, GH should have a better guitar... I mean it's called GUITAR HERO. You'd expect the guitar and bass to be better. Although almost a tie, I give the slight edge to RB, because in GH, when you get "starpower," the colors turn blue and I would always miss a note as I switched to starpower because the colors go away. In RB, the colors stay, so I can safely deploy "overdrive" and keep my streak going!

4. Last, but not least, the songs, man! We keep unlocking new songs, and they keep rocking. Electric version! Reptillia! (although GH3 has this too) Don't Fear the Reaper! (VERY fun to sing) The Who, The Rolling Stones, BOSTON!! Bowie, Black Sabbath, (early) Weezer! The songs are great, and more can be downloaded.

Rock Band simply rocks. So go get Rock Band, or be like me, and bum off of a friend who has it. Why waste your time with a "real" instrument when you could be earning virtual fans, traveling all over the world with your band, and having a great time?

Why Jared, Why??

gotta take sown that pic

The Best Second of the Year

Anti-Bears: 5.0

Bears: 0.0

Picking out a single second to call your favorite of the year is trimming all the possible candidates down to the one that has 1000 milliseconds of pure joy. Thus it is impossible to have any bears for the champion. Many people have favorite days or even months, but I have one definite choice for the ultimate annual second.

It is a moment of doubt, a flash of uncertainty, yet a beacon of hope. It comes on the birthday of our country, the greatest in world history. I look forward to this second every year.

Which second, you ask? For certain! It is without a doubt the last second of the hot dog eating contest on Coney Island, when everyone scrambles to shove in the last bits of pig and soggy bun into their mouth (as long as it's in there when time's up, it counts!)

Congrats to Joey Chestnut, eating 59 dogs in 10 minutes and beating Kobayashi in a 5 dog eat-off after the tie. Way to keep the title belt in America.

Fireworks!

Happy 4th of July everybody! I was driving past the fireworks stands the other night and realized I hadn't bought fireworks in years and years. I probably wouldn't even recognize what new technologies they have available these days, but here are the ones I remember.

Let's start the review off with a bang. These were cool. I always felt like an army soldier and wrapped these things over my shoulder. If Kevin McCallister could use them to scare away a pizza delivery guy in Home Alone, surely I could employ them to a grand purpose as well. I don't think I ever did though. I probably just sat around staring at the cool Black Cat logo.

Tanks- I was all over these things. It combined my favorite passion for little Hot Wheels cars and toys into a sweet, compact, and menacing looking firework. As I recall they never rolled as well as I thought they were going to on those little paper wheels, and only scooted a foot or two anyways.

Sparklers- A classic firework, a classic dud in my opinion. You had to stand there and once the initial joy of getting the sparks to fly with the "Hsssss!" wore off, the only thing left that you could do was move your arms around in awkward motions to make light shapes in the night. Quite a girly firework, if you ask me. The stuff for gymnasts and baton twirlers. Kevin McCallister wouldn't be caught dead with one of these sissies.

Roman candles. My dream as a little kid was to get in a roman candle fight with the older kids in the neighborhood. I was always too scared to ever get that experience, my one true 4th of July regret; I don't like to talk about it.

Rockets- Ahoy! Now these were something to get excited about! I remember these being a bit more expensive than the other fireworks, so I had to shell out a bit more dough to blast one of these guys into the sky. Oh man. What is better than putting five bucks on a launch pad, lighting it with a punk, and seeing it skate off sideways down the street instead of actually going upwards? Now that's something to buy!

Finally, Snaps. Ah, after it's all done, these were what remained. You could carry the joy of July 4th into July 5th, 6th, and 7th with these snaps. They were packaged in sawdust that got all into your pocket. Nothing more refreshing than thinking you were out of snaps and then discovering one last one hiding in the bag under the dust. These were worthless.

Anti-bears: 1.0. I can't actually think of anything good to say about fireworks, other than I can't imagine the 4th of July without them.

Bears: 4.5. If you can't tell, I don't like fireworks. July 4th is cool, but I don't dig watching the same thing over and over and over, especially if I had to pay for them. I'll be in watching the Cards/Cubs game on Friday night. Hopefully Zambrano will get lit up.

Six beers and no dinner

...is what I had tonight. I'm drunk and kind of woozy and it's almost 1am, which means I have to be at work for a meeting in almost 7 hours. Wow!

Recommendation: go see WALL-E (I think it's an acronym and so I think I punctuated it correctly, but who knows!). Anyway, it's a fucking fantastic film. It's beautiful. Sniff.

Also, I'm going to throw in the 1-2 punch combo of the Dead Boys' "Hey Little Girl" and "I Need Lunch". Fuck "Sonic Reducer", even if it is Anthony Bourdain's favorite song or something like that. These two are much better. It's a good song, but it plays third fiddle to the aforementioned duo.

So, like, what's going on tonight? I'm going to sleep I think. PEACE.

An American Classic

Sadly, due to various family issues and scheduling conflicts, I will not be going to my usual family reunion in South Carolina this year. The most devastating part of this is that I can't make it to any Bojangles fast food joints, which aren't located anywhere near here. In tribute, I am awarding them:

4.89 Anti-bears. Best chicken sandwich available in the US says a lot in my mind. Their slogan is "Southern Born and Breaded." And even Garz, the chicken tender expert, says this place is tops. You can't buy a better endorsement than that. Bojangles also claims to have the best iced tea on the planet, and that's no Harvard lie. Throw in a few Bo'Berry Biscuits for dessert and you've got yourself a primo fast food staple.

2 Bears. I have to plan a road trip to the coast just to eat there. It may very well be worth it though. I can pick people up on the way if you're interested.

A new low

So once again, I may be writing something that is not a formal review. But at risk of inviting sean's scorn, I have to say it. I suppose I could write it in review form:

5 BEARS

Family Guy on TBS. Yes, I was watching family guy. I guess that was my first problem. But it's raining outside and I don't feel like doing anything at all tonight. Anyways, it's mid episode, and the screen just freezes, with Brian and Stewie still on screen. Then, Bill Engvall walks onto the screen and says something like "They've got a dog named brian, and I've got a son named Brian... watch the Bill engvall show Tuesday nights at 9:30... now back to your show." And then the show resumed. Honestly, wtf is that? Give me a commercial, or give me show. Don't squeeze them both in at the same time. I thought good ol product placement was bad enough. What's worse than a character in a show conveniently holding a drink so that the label squarely faces the camera... well, this is.